I've been where you are right now. I've gone through really hard things, really surprising events that knocked me for a loop and left me reeling. I've redesigned my life a number of times now as circumstances changed and I woke up to what made me feel happier and more connected.
Resilience is about being able to get back up and moving when adversity knocks us off our feet. It's about having the vision, strength and tools, not just to rebuild our lives, but to redesign them.
It's about optimal thinking not optimism. And it's about being able to take quick and effective reality checks so that we have an accurate gauge of what is happening and where we stand.
In 2006 I was working at Leica camera as a tech rep for the highest-end camera system they made. It was a great job that kept me interested and paid me a whole lot of money. I had just married and everything looked great for my future. And then life shifted, as it does, and my marriage and job both unraveled at the same time.
And I did what every human does, I fell apart, I got totally stuck and I swung from being pissed off to feeling like I'd never get out of this hole. And then I got really fed up with feeling that way. I get fed up with being stuck and I started by taking a hard look at what was really going on. I took a reality check.
I began to think about what I needed to change. First- regroup. I needed to look at where I was and what I wanted next for myself. and I needed to be honest about it. I tapped some key friends who were willing and able to walk dogs at all hours of the day, and who would talk to me about their own perspectives, and I listened. Really listened. And after a lot of listening, I started considering what it was I really wanted for myself. What was really important and what did I need to do to build that for myself. In effect, I tapped into my own strengths, my resilience.
A year later my life looked really different. I was working to build a career path of my own design and loving every minute of the work. I felt connected to the community where I lived and I felt happier and less stressed. I'd created a life I loved out of life's adversity. And here's a secret that I discovered, adversity is great. It sucks, and it's wonderful at the same time. Adversity is like doing push-ups; it's the floor we need in order to grow stronger. Without the floor… No push-ups. And being stronger, being resilient, that's what lets us, what let me build the life I love. A life that makes me happy and let's me feel connected to what I know is important for myself. And it has let me know that I can be resilient, whenever life throws me for a loop.
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